Lime Scooter Liberalism

Our elites can easily be understood through their use of “Lime scooters.”

Every day on my walk home from my internship, I am nearly hit by a Capitol Hill staffer zooming to the metro station on an electric Lime scooter. You know the drill. The story is probably familiar to those in large cities: you hear their incessant bell ringing, you quickly duck to one side of the sidewalk as quickly as you can, and just as the individual passes you, they slow down on their scooter just enough to stare into your soul, as if you are the problem for not getting out of their way fast enough.

The instances of this problem are manifold. While many city-dwellers like myself have mastered the art of avoiding Lime scooters, others have been less fortunate. One needs not to do extensive research to see the magnitude of crashes involving Lime scooters and pedestrians or other vehicles. As the instances rack up, it seems little is being done to address this problem. Yet, it does not have to be this way, and several lessons can be drawn from an inquiry into electric scooters. We do not have to be ruled by “Lime Scooter Liberals,” after all.

It is not difficult to profile the average operator of a Lime scooter. Someone young, single, in their twenties, high-powered, and on their way to their downtown white-collar job aptly meets the description of who we are talking about. They are in a hurry, far too much of one for the work they do, however. It is the classic description of a city liberal. They may as well be carrying a Starbucks order and some avocado toast along with them. They really believe they own the road.

Within this framework comes an important recognition: this is who rules us. Urban elites shoving you off of your sidewalk as you attempt to modestly commute to work or school; the person on the scooter is oblivious to your safety and well-being. There is a certain populist rage that flows from these encounters. I will not lie: every time a lime scooter wizzes past me, as they incessantly ring their bell, the insatiable desire to shove them off their little scooter foments; the feeling that we, regular Americans, have every right to dispose or shove off our leadership class burns within me. Those using the scooters are the encapsulation of the elites we are fighting against — the ones who ignore the needs and safety of the people as we rush to get out of their way and serve them.

The experiment in Lime scooters and populism goes further. Now imagine who has to drive around each night and reposition or pick up and charge the scooters. You guessed it: illegal immigrants. If we had to figure, the majority of van drivers picking up Lime scooters each evening are either illegal immigrants or low-skilled immigrants. This is all the more reflective of the broader forces at play. As hard-working Americans are pushed off the sidewalk, they too are also pushed out of the workforce. In their place are illegal immigrants more than willing to take a low-paying hourly wage to perform many of the professional services and jobs that blue-collar Americans working to provide for their families would otherwise perform.

These immigrants are more than willing to collect Lime scooters, too, which is all the more representative of our elite’s abuse of migrant labor. To our elite, illegal immigration serves as a tool to serve themselves, as the immigrants perform the service tasks that are supposedly “below” the dignity of our elite class. This leads to the recognition that both legal and illegal immigration is destructive to America and why President Trump’s election in November and his policy proposal of mass deportations is critical.

Lex orandi, lex credendi. The way of worship is what we believe. Furthermore, instead of our society standing tall, feet together, hands folded, and praying to God, Lime scooters have produced a new form and style of prayer and worship. Instead of a traditional pose of prayer, those using Lime scooters spread their arms wide to reach the handlebars and criss-cross their feet to maintain balance on the narrow scooter’s platform. This is an ungodly standing position — one not of professionalism and respect, but instead of speed and incessant movement and progress.

This position is reflective of the fact that our society no longer prays with our souls aimed to heaven, but instead, our arms are wide open for the things of this world. Make no mistake: if our elite have no reverence for their own people, they certainly have no reverence or worship for the Lord. They do not rule with the good in mind, but instead how to maximize their personal comfort and status. Their style of movement and prayer says as much.

Finally, it would be remiss if making cities livable again were not addressed. In a world in which cities strive to be “walkable,” they have instead been transformed to accommodate infinite numbers of bike lanes and make room for scooters. Let me be clear, this is no tirade against cars — they serve their own important function and must be preserved. However, no one is safe from the incessant racing of scooters.

Moreover, the numerous alternatives to Lime scooters makes clear the very reason they are so cherished by citizens of metropolitan cities. The metro, the bus, walking — it makes one common. It can make one feel unimportant and uninspired. They are just one of the masses. On a scooter, one feels powerful, alone, able to command, and most importantly, a free individual. Yet, no one is a free individual and lanes for bikes and scooters have consistently denigrated the people’s ability to walk and commute without hindrance.  

Recovering our cities, making them walkable, and rebuilding a republic with a new elite that represents the people begins with a simple policy prescription: ban the Lime scooters. Some will think this policy is foolish, immature, or outright silly. There is no mincing of words here, though. I am a young man and I am well aware of my peer’s affinity for these electric scooters. I am also aware that the majority of scooter-users are wealthy and that our elite do not take kindly to commoners taking a stand against their exploits. In all seriousness, however, we must make our Lime Scooter Liberals walk amongst the people, to feel a crack on the sidewalk with their own two feet, to feel the imperfection of society, but most importantly, to walk alongside their fellow countrymen.

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